


How Rare and Beautiful It Is

by Serendipitous_Posts



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Dancing in the Rain, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gemlings, Gift Giving, Lapidot Week, Love Confessions, Marriage Proposal, Ugly Sweaters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-05-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:15:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23862883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Serendipitous_Posts/pseuds/Serendipitous_Posts
Summary: A series of Oneshots exploring Lapis and Peridot's relationshipApril 26th:Dancing in the RainPeridot is upset that she missed out on Lapis' first Rainday. Flowers are planted and dances are had.April 27th:Sweater WeatherLapis never should have learnt how to knitApril 28th:Good Nights and Good MorningsLapis loves sleeping, and Peridot loves LapisApril 29th:Drawing EachotherWhat made Lapis decide to return to Earth?April 30th:ConfessionsAll the "I love you"'s throughout the yearsMay 1st:Married and Kids AuMay 2ndFirst and Last Kiss
Relationships: Lapis Lazuli/Peridot (Steven Universe)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 52





	1. Dancing in the Rain

The sound of clanging alerts Lapis to her barnmate's incoming.

Peridot wouldn't know subtlety if it crawled out of her Gem, and the sound of her as she scaled the ten foot tall vertical water tower would be impressive to a newcomer, but at this point it was practically mundane, so Lapis didn't do much more than shift slightly to give her green . . . _friend_ space as she awkwardly flopped over the edge, letting out a cheer as she reached the top.

"Neyhehe!" She giggled, pulling herself up beside Lapis to bare little pointed fangs at the ground below "I have **conquered** you!"

"And it only took you two hours" Lapis deadpanned as she did _not_ react to Peri leaning into her.

"I know!" Peridot grinned, looking smug "a new record!" She pulled away slightly, and Lapis let out a little disappointed 'oh' that the little Gem thankfully seemed to miss. "A record I wouldn't need to be breaking if _you_ would just _fly me up_."

"Eh, the climbings good for you" she grinned a little at Peridot's affronted expression, before turning away to stare at the land surrounding them. She could see the place where the Orchids they had tried to grow were, now withered and dead, the _one_ plant they had yet to master.

Peridot, following her gaze, gave a little hum of realisation "it's very . . . green, isn't it?" She said, like it was the highest compliment one could give to another.

Lapis snorted "yeah, it is. You fit right in."

"Actually, save for the plants we are growing, I have yet to find another creature on this planet that is green like me" she paused "well, Steven mentioned 'hoppers of grass' but _apparently_ they can spit acid, so I'm not sure I want to meet them."

The tall blue Gem stared at the smaller one for a second in disbelief before whistling, a new trick that Steven had taught her "never saw anything like that, although" she trailed off here, glancing up at the sky for a moment "I did see some weird things, when I was- um, under the sea."

Peridot nodded, enthusiastic and carefully ignoring Lapis' slip up. _This_ was why they were friends. "Oh yeah, Amethyst told me about them! They're called fish! Did you know that Earth doesn't even know half of the Ocean's wildlife? Talk about **ignorant**."  
  


Lapis found herself agreeing; while she liked Earth, her opinions on it's inhabitants were pretty indescivie, mostly because, outside of Steven, Connie and whoever that 'Greg' guy was, she had never met any humans. Unless you counted Camp Pining Hearts, but she was pretty sure if she ever met Paulette, she would uppercut her into the ocean.

"I saw this one . . fish that would expand if you got too close" Lapis reminisced fondly "scared the hell out of us- me. Scared the hell out of me."

Peridot looked amazed at this new information, pulling a notebook out of _who-knows-where_ and scribbling in it fiercely. "But how? Doesn't that break the law of conversation of mass?" She gasped, almost dropping her fancy fountain pen that had almost _certainly_ been stolen from Amethyst who stole it from Pearl. "Are other creatures on Earth capable of that? Is Steven? Is _Greg_?"

And now her friend was _looking at her_ , like she had all the answers to life, the universe and everything, eyes shining beneath her visor as her hair stood up in all directions, and Lapis was very, _very_ gay (a new term, thank you _Pearl_ ) and so blurts out the first thing that comes to mind.

"There weren't any Pumpkins down there."

. . .

Okay, **look**. _Nobody_ here said that Lapis was smart, and she could see her pet ( _pet_? Like a Pearl? Or a Spinel?) playing down below, and she _panicked_ and now-

-oh **Stars** , Peridot was doing the thing, with her eyes like she had just realised something beyond the ken of measly gay idiots everywhere.

"Of _course_! Underwater flora would be **completely** different than overground flora! Less light **and** less rain-"

"No rain."

Peridot stopped scribbling in her notebook, which is great because Lapis is pretty sure she can hear the pen _weeping_ , but the manic look doesn't leave her eyes at all. "What?"

Lapis carefully folded her legs underneath her in a kneeling position, which caused Peridot to scooch back slightly, looking slightly . . . _disappointed_? In the sudden lack of contact "it doesn't rain down there. I didn't even know what rain was until - until I got out."

Not that she was particularly impressed once she discovered it either. It was handy for farming, but other than that? Useless.

But already Peri was making sharp gestures with her hands, "HOLD ON, hold on, are you telling me, that I missed out on your first rain day?" The hands fell into Peri's lap, as she stared, crushed, up at her barnmate.

_Slag, slag, slag, you messed up, you messed up **big** -_

Lapis tried to laugh it off "well yeah, but it doesn't matter, it's just _water_ -"

"Just water!" Peridot repeated, somewhat hysterical. "Have you ever seen another planet that _drips water_ from the _sky_?"

She hesitated "does- does acid count as water?"

The technician stared, bug eyed for a moment, before; " **NO!** "

"Okay, okay!" Lapis put up both of her hands, feeling oddly defensive about the whole thing "just thought I'd ask." 

That did absolutely nothing to soothe Peridot's feelings, as she just curled up into a ball, with a frown on her face.

_Great job, **Lazuli**_

* * *

Luckily for Lapis' self worth, the conversation is abandoned and forgotten, until almost a week later, when Peridot all but kicks the barn door in, almost faceplanting as she bounds inside to where Lapis was reading one of those 'trashy romance novels' Amethyst keeps giving her.

She's finally reaching the part that Amethyst assured her is ' _hot_ ' and ' _steamy_ ' and so is a little annoyed when Peridot grabs one of her arms and _pulls_ her out of her hammock, dragging her _slowly_ towards the door.

"Come on, Lazuli, work with me here!" Peridot grits out as she hauls Lapis towards the open door. Lapis herself, laying on her back and staring blankly up at the ceiling, does not react besides a very slow blink. It's only when they're outside, almost ten minutes later, that she pulls herself to her feet and smiles at the exhausted Peridot.

"You wanted something?"

Peridot doesn't respond; instead choosing to stick her tongue out and march away. "Oh, that's mature" Lapis calls after her as she easily catches up.

It is only then that she really registers the weather around them; it is 'drizzling' a term used for when it is lightly raining, and the feeling of droplets hitting her skin reminds her of the conversation they had all those days ago, and how upset Peri had been.

She's always been pretty ambivalent towards the rain, but that memory may have just ruined it for her.

Peridot turns a corner, then spins dramatically around to face her, hands on hips, triumphant even as the rain starts to wrestle with the mess that is her hair. "Lazuli, I have something to show you."

"Yeah, I got that when you literally dragged me from the barn" Lapis tries to crane her neck around to see what Peridot is blocking but she lets out a screech of anger when she does, so Lapis snaps her head back.

"Thank you" Peridot said pleasantly, like she didn't just _fracking screech_ at Lapis not two seconds ago. "I would like you to meet the newest addition to our farm" and then she moves aside.

Lapis and Peridot had been branching out in their gardening, particularly in the flower department. With Lapis' powers and Peridot's . . . Peridoting, they had singlehandedly mastered the care for every single flower.

Except one.

**The Orchid.**

Forget the Diamond Authority, these _weeds_ were the real banes of their existence. Connie had heard their troubles, and tried to reassure them, telling them that Orchids were considered one of the hardest plants to care for, that even the most experienced gardeners had troubles with it. Not that that helped much; many a tantrum had been thrown over this stupid, pretty plant. The temptation to just . . ask Steven for help was strong, but they wanted to do this on their own.

It got to the point where they were both strongly considering Amethyst's idea of Goat Sacrificing, Peridot had looked into it and it seemed ' _legit_ ' as the humans said.

But now.

Oh, but _now_ -

In a small, small circle, were a couple of orchids, tall and healthy and alive, _and_ not dead.

And _blue_.

Lapis gapes, unable to even begin to say anything as she stared at the flowers that had only just come into bloom. Peridot rocks back on her heels, grin even larger now as she saw her partners blatant shock.

The rain is starting to come down heavy now, starting to soak through their clothes, but the way Peridot is acting, it was if the sun itself was shining down on her.

Lapis opens her mouth to say something, closes it again, then takes a step forwards to get a better look, bending down to inspect the petals. Her jaw tightens as she spins around to face Peridot, ignoring how her hair is beginning to stick to her face thanks to the determined rainfall "you cheated!" She accuses.

Peridot blinks, hurt "I did not!" 

The blue Gem looks between her and the Orchids "yeah, you did. There are no such thing as blue Orchids, you had to have done something to them" honestly, she _had_ read the same gardening books Peridot did, did she really think she wouldn't notice?

Surprisingly, Peridot **blushes** , sending up small splashes from newly forming puddles as she fidgets on the spot, fixing her eyes on a point beyond Lapis. "I didn't cheat" she says in a quavering sort of voice "not really. I- uh, I got Steven to take me to a Gardening Center, and I bought white Orchids, and I planted them here approximately one week ago."

Lapis **stares** at her, trying to drill the simple point through her visor and into her head "they're blue."

She clears her throat awkwardly, shifting from foot to foot "yes, well, I thought I could" she gestures helplessly towards the flowers "inject them. With some dye."

Lapis shoves her now sodden hair out of her eyes, frowning as it just flopped down again. What had happened to that nice drizzle? She was **soaked**. And, more importantly-

"Why blue? Of all colours, why blue?"

Peridot grimaces, looking like she had just been caught out. "W-well" she rubs her fingers together "I- I like blue?" She offers, throwing up her hands in a _what do you do?_ kind of gesture.

There is something in that, something that Lapis felt like she should be seeing, but, to be honest, it is hard to see even a meter in front of her. The rain is coming down hard now, hitting her skin and filling her ears with the rhythmic **pit-pat** sound. Through the sheet of rain, everything is blurry and mushed up, and Lapis glances back behind her to make sure that the Orchids, which, apparently, _weren't_ the byproduct of Steven or some other outsider playing Diamond, only to see-

She has to take a step back.

Through the rain, the awful, dreadful, downpouring rain, all you could see of the Orchids were the colours-

Blue and Green.

The Orchids petals and stems and leaves.

Blue and Green and Blue and Green.

Mixing, mashing together, blurring so much that it was impossible to see where one colour ended and another began.

Blue and Green.

"Earth's colours" Peridot says, splashing up beside her, voice trembling.

" _Our_ colours" Lapis agrees, sliding her hand through her brilliant, amazing, special partner.

Peridot **shrieks** when Lapis picks her up, spinning her around as she bounces through the puddles. It doesn't take long for the shrieks to become laughter, or for Lapis to join in, both of them soaked to the skin as they do. 

Lapis slips, falling backwards, accidentally crushing two of the Orchids they had worked so hard to even exist, but neither cared, Lapis already rolling to her feet and Peridot already jumping into her arms. It didn't even occur to Lapis to use her wings- this was an Earth dance, not a sky dance.

Peridot's hair is flattened against the rain, making her look smaller than ever, frailer than ever, but she laughs the same as she kicks her way through the puddle, and Lapis laughs with her as she, a Lapis Lazuli, a high ranking Gem, is splashed with mud, some of which gets in her mouth. It just makes her laugh harder. There is no worries about the mirror or Malachite or Fusion at all- they are just two friends dancing through the rain and mud and flowers, howling at the sky.

All those days ago, on the water tower, she hadn't understood why Peridot seemed so upset she missed out on her first rain day.

Now, laughing as she twirled and twisted, feeling her dress float out around her and Peridot put their foreheads together, she finally got it.

* * *

And through the rain, the amazing, wonderful, downpouring rain, all you could see of the two were the colours-

Mixing, mashing together, blurring so much that it was impossible to see where one colour ended and another began.

Just Blue and Green and Blue and Green.

The Earth's Colours.

Blue and Green.


	2. Sweater Weather

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lapis never should have learnt how to knit

_You should pick up some new hobbies, Lapis. It'll be fun, Lapis._

Past Steven was an _idiot_.

And now he was sprinting, down the boardwalk, past confused Gems and Humans alike as he tried to put as much distance between himself and his house as possible.

Yet the muffled pat of feet behind him told him that _she_ was catching up. 

It was then that Steven saw him, his lord, his savior, his-

**"LION!"**

The great pink cat was reclining in the sun, head on his paws, but he looked up at the sound of Steven's voice, rising up as if expecting a battle. Sensing safety on the horizon, Steven lunged, wincing as he heard the boardwalk's wood crack as he did. _I can fix that._

His floating powers kicking in, he covered the distance easily, and his left hand began to twine into Lion's mane, melding with it as the portal to wherever Lars was opened up. He felt the corners of his mouth begin to pull up into a victorious smile-

And then he was yanked upwards, away from his pink friend. Lion let out a little roar of confusion, but, upon seeing Lapis, just settled back down, looking bored, and ignoring his owner's panicked screams.

"Oh stars, this is it, oh please, have _mercy_ -"

Lapis threw him lightly, catching him so that they were eye to eye. "Steven" she said, calmly, with a too wide smile on her face "me and Peridot worked hard on those sweaters. You are **putting yours on**."

And, before Steven could try and argue _heatstroke_ , Lapis' wings flapped and flipped, and they were back at the house, Steven clinging to the Gem for protection.

The very second Steven's feet hit the sand, Peridot was out and racing down the steps, wearing the ugliest article of clothing Steven had seen her wear yet- and that was saying something.

"Steven!" She cheered, as if she didn't just see Steven run away from her five minutes ago "we made you this." Absolutely beaming, she handed Steven the sweater.

Steven tried very hard not to grimace, aware of the two staring at him, awaiting validation "it's . . . great" he tried "it'll be really useful for when I . . . have to be seen from space."

"Oh, is that their function?" Peridot tilted her head, before shaking it "oh, and Amethyst warned us that we may need a seizure warning for it, so-" she flipped her hands over, and Steven copied the gesture, biting his lip when he saw the **PLEASE DON'T HAVE A SEIZURE** on the back of the sweater, in bright neon green.

" . . . . thanks guys. I'll, uh, put it on later."

"I think you should put it on now" Lapis said, wings flapping from anticipation as Peridot nodded enthusiastically "you're meeting up with Connie later, right? I'm sure she'll love it!"

Steven tried to laugh it off, but Peridot and Lapis just stared at him expectantly. Biting back a groan- or tears- he put the monstrosity of colours on, wincing when he heard someone start to weep in the distance. "I love it" he forced out, and the two cheered.

He turned around and trudged away from the two proud Gems, hoping that nobody would take a picture of the thing he was wearing today. He doubted it though, with it's colours that he didn't even know _existed_ , it had the annoying habit of drawing your attention from anything else.

Had the sweater been less . . . . well less, he almost certainly would have noticed the expertly made sweater that Peridot was wearing, simple and stylish, with the words ' **PROPERTY OF LAPIS** ' written on the back.

"Oh, you think you're funny, don't you" Peridot asked her when she first saw it. "Well jokes on you, because I am _never_ taking it off."

Lapis laughed as she leaned down for a kiss as Peridot snuggled into the soft material.


	3. Good Nights and Good Mornings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lapis loves sleeping, and Peridot loves Lapis

Lapis had taken to the concept of sleeping like a fish to water, no pun intended.

You would think that she would _dislike_ the idea of entering her subconscious, where she couldn't leave for a period of time, but she loved it! ( **Okay** , the nightmares kind of _sucked_ , but beyond that, it was great)

Peridot, meanwhile, had never seen the appeal of it all. Why sit still and do _nothing_ for hours, when there was work to be done? 

"Why _work_ when you could _sleep_?" Lapis had shot back, laughing as she dodged the Camp Pining Hearts Pillow Peridot threw at her.

But while she never really liked _sleeping_ , she did like _watching_ Lapis _sleep_.

She was careful not to bring it up to the others, because the last time she had, Steven had a weird look on his face, and muttered something about 'Pearl' and 'Lion' before retreating back to the relative safety of the Boardwalk. 

She wasn't sure what was wrong with it, per say. Hours of browsing through Camp Pining Hearts fanfiction had told her that watching somebody sleep was indeed normal, and Steven was indeed crazy for believing otherwise.

Also, bed sharing was _incredibly_ common.

Not that either Peridot or Lapis had beds. Their new and improved home, built exactly where the barn had been, instead had little hammocks installed everywhere "I just think they're neat" Lapis had shrugged when they were decorating, and that had been good enough for Peridot.

But there was something special about watching Lapis sleep. Whenever she 'turned in', a strange phrase, all of her usual grace and class would disappear, to be replaced by a long, lanky blue Gem that snored and chewed on her hair in her sleep.

_Majestic_ , Peridot thought, watching Lapis snort and turn over, almost falling out of the hammock in the process. _Have you ever seen such beauty?_

But the **best** parts were right before bed, where Lapis would change- _change!_ \- into pyjamas and lie down on her hammock. Peridot would always stop whatever she was doing; watching TV, drawing up plans, writing fanfiction, what have you, and scurry over to her, sometimes literally on all fours.

Then, in a performance that put Percy and Paulette to shame, she would lightly kiss Lapis on the nose. "Good night!" She would chirp, and Lapis would snort.

"Dork" was her usual insult, but she _always_ waited for Peridot before she went to sleep.

Peridot loved Good Nights.

* * *

Waking up was Lapis' favourite part of the whole _sleeping_ concept.

It hadn't been, not at first. The idea of waking up and seeing what fun way life would beat her down had never been on her wish list. Sleeping was fun, and numbed you to the existential despair of the world around you, which would one day consume you and everything you have ever cared for.

**Now though!**

**Now** , whenever she woke up, Peridot would be somewhere, usually working on something, hopefully not fanfiction (she would never forgive her for the Shrek the Ogre Debacle of November). But, no matter what, she would always have her back turned to Lapis' hammock, as if to try and hide the fact that she liked to stare at her when she slept.

(Waking up to find glowing eyes not ten inches away from you was an . . . . _experience_. Sometimes it felt that Lapis had a cat instead of a girlfriend.)

Lapis would leap out of her hammock and pad up behind Peridot. Then, when the moment was right, she would scoop the smaller Gem up. Always, _always_ , Peridot would let out this little high pitched squeal, thrilled at being caught.

(Huh. Maybe _Lapis_ was the cat.)

"Good morning!" Lapis would smile at her girlfriend, planting a kiss right on Peridot's Gem, which was a ticklish spot and always made her giggle.

"Good morning!" Peridot would say, before her face fell, and she tried to scowl at Lapis. Then their next part of the morning would begin; with Peridot faux complaining about how Lapis had interrupted her work once more, and that she would never, _ever_ forgive her _ever_ , and Lapis would just nod right along, smiling as they walked out the doors.

There was a reason they were known as 'those weird farmer-artist couple' after all.

Lapis loved Good Mornings.


	4. Drawing Eachother

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What made Lapis decide to return to Earth?

Finding a new planet to spend the rest of your existence on was hard. Especially when every planet just seemed _wrong_ , in ways that Lapis couldn't quite put her finger on.

(That planet, a familiar shade of green. _Definitely_ couldn't go there. The one beside it, not enough green, and she _couldn't_ live without-)

_Well_.

Who said she even needed a planet to live on?

Now _there_ was a thought. The Diamonds couldn't track her as easily if she was just floating around in space with their-her barn. She paused, looking back over her shoulder, but Earth had long since vanished from sight.

(because you abandoned it.)

Yes, maybe this was the right way to go. Stay in space, not meeting anybody who she could get attached to, grow dependant on, ~~betray.~~

Entering the barn wasn't hard, she easily cut through the water like she had when she had been-

(the crushing weight of the ocean, rage a heavy weight in her stomach, knowing she may never see the surface again)

She blinked, and forcefully shoved those thoughts out of her head. She had to do that now, ground herself when those memories popped up, because there was ~~anybody~~ anything around to help her.

The barn, at least, looked the same, albeit a bit dishevelled and messy, meep-morps strewn about the place as she had been flying. ~~Peridot's~~ an old tape recorder lay on the floor, gutted, with it's tape hanging out. She picked it up, and thoughtfully fingered the playback button.

(it's stupid. you don't deserve to hear her voice, not after what you've done)

She pressed the button, but all that came out was crackling, and what may of have been voices long ago. Then, what may have been a laugh, a familiar laugh, if said laugh was underwater, muffled, _drowning_ -

Yelping, Lapis threw the tape recorder, watching wide eyed as it slammed into the small pile of sketchbooks.

(see, the ribbon is even blue. i got yo' number! a wink and a nervous smile. a blue ribbon and a box.)

"Oh no" she moaned, already racing across the floor to the toppled sketchbooks and the even more broken tape recorder.

(you just break everything, don't you?)

Picking up the smooth metal and turning it over in her hands, she was relived to find that, besides a single crack running down the side, it was still there. It could be fixed. Everything could be fixed.

(you can't)

One of the sketchbooks had flopped open upon impact. They had been a gift, from Steven, back when he first saw the Meep-Morps. This one was one of the first, the drawings crude and messy, little more than mishapen lumps. Before she even knew it, Lapis was reaching for another Sketchbook, her own.

They were very simplistic, at first; a drawing of a flower, of a plank of wood. They had been caught up in the splendor of it all, of recreating life with lead, that they had drawn just about everything around them. As it goes on though, the drawings become better, cleaner, and start to show living creatures.

She almost cries when she see's Pumpkin in there. 

She weeps when she sees Peridot.

It's not even a _good_ drawing, the only way you could know for sure it was Peridot was the hair and the gem. Otherwise, you may of have mistaken it for a pine tree. The next page is another pine tree, and the next, and the next . . . .

. . . . . she hadn't noticed how often she drew Peridot.

She was everywhere in her sketchbook, little doodles, full blown bodyarts, on her own, with Pumpkin.

. . It wasn't that weird. They lived together, after all, and who better to draw inspiration from than the only other creature capable of communication around. She bet Peridot's sketchbook was full of drawings of herself, probably all boasting about how great she was.

She reached for Peridot's most recent sketchbook, and flipped open to a random page. And stopped.

She was everywhere. Flying, laughing, sleeping, smiling, frowning.

She flipped to another page, then another. Still her, no Peridot in sight.

Peridot's drawings were neat, precise, showing exactly what she wanted others to see. The last drawing was half finished, of Lapis, half sitting half kneeling, Pumpkin in her lap as she looked up at the sky.

What was Lapis' last drawing?

She scrambled to find her most recent sketchbook, flipping past the pages until-

Oh.

She had been experimenting with watercolors, she remembered. Painting had been a fun project for her, too messy for Peridot, and she was much better at it then drawing. She had painted hundreds of times, experimenting with colors, so often that she forgot half of them.

But she remembered this one. A memory.

Peridot, sitting criss cross, with the setting sun behind her, setting her yellow hair on fire, was staring up, out of the crisp pages, eyes wide and smile wider.

It was the best painting Lapis had ever made, easily seen and understood.

It was supposed to be a gift, but she had never gotten around to finishing it.

Trembling, she flipped back a couple of pages. She loved watercolours, and she especially loved how abstract she could make things. The green blurs racing across the pages probably looked like nothing to anyone else, but to her, they were her friend. Always in motion, always moving. Laughing, smiling.

Peridot had seemed to understand what they meant as well, the few times Lapis had shown her, looking flushed but pleased, and within the hour, a funny comic doodle of them and Pumpkin would turn up on her side of the barn.

(funny, smart and kind)

(and you gave that up?)

She had jumped to her feet without even realising, pushing out the door and into the expanse of space.

(you need to-)

-go back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lapis is an abstract painter, change my mind.
> 
> And yes, for anyone wondering, both Lapis and Peridot painted/sketched the exact same moment, except Lapis painted what Peridot had been doing, while Peridot sketched was Lapis had been doing


	5. Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All the "I love you"'s throughout the years

"I think I love you."

Peridot glances up from the microwave she's been experimenting with. Lapis is hovering a ways away, the genuinely puzzled look on her face betraying her bland tone.

Peridot puts down the microwave "what?" She asks, because _what_?

Lapis just stares dramatically off into the distance, like one of those movie stars on the television. "Well, at the very least I don't despise you anymore" she says, then shrugs "I dunno, I was just watching you" she makes a vague gesture with her hands " _tinker,_ and I realised that I like you."

"Gee, thanks" Peridot huffs, turning back around so Lapis can't see her smile.

* * *

"I think I love you."

They're watching Andy fly off in his plane (and fighting the urge to blow it up) when Peridot says it.

Lapis turns to regard her, and the little Gem is holding the wedding cake, staring at it with bafflement. "Why though?" She asks, because that seems like a reasonable response. The look Peridot gives her, the same one she gives when Lapis refers to herself as useless, or a waste of space, tells her that she disagrees.

"I asked Steven about this whole 'marriage' thing, and he told me that when two people love each other very much, they decide to live together forever. We live together, so, by reverse engineering this marriage thing, then I love you!" She beams, obviously proud of herself for figuring this out.

Lapis snorts and nods her head "fair enough."

* * *

It's watching Camp Pining Hearts that they finally realise what love actually means.

They spend the rest of the night rewatching the show, and _not_ meeting each others eyes.

* * *

They stop saying it after that.

"You're my best friend" Peridot says instead.

"I care about you" Lapis will say.

After all, they're _Gems_. They can't feel that way.

* * *

Lapis goes to the moon, tail tucked between her legs, tired in a way she hasn't been in ages.

She originally only stopped there for a quick rest, but then finds an Observation Orb. It's just a quick checkup, making sure that Peridot is okay with the others, a brief glance then she's gone.

. . . . . . she looks so _sad_.

So Lapis spends weeks, in the same sitting position, watching Peridot interact with other creatures.

_I love you_ sits on her tongue, but she doesn't say it.

There's nobody to say it to.

* * *

Lapis returns, and _what_ a return! Dropping their _barn_ on a _Diamond_!

(Later, she'll be mad at all of the Meep-Morps that were destroyed, but for now-)

Peridot bounds across the beach towards Lapis ( _Lapis_! Peridot felt as if her Gem was full of fizz and stars.), kicking up sand when she skids to a stop.

So many things to say, now that Lapis is here ( **Lapis**! **Is**! **Here**! In front of her!) but all she can manage is "hey."

She doesn't seem to comment on the dress Peridot is wearing, or the Wedding Outfits or the Wedding or the realisation that Gems can, in fact feel that way towards another.

(That had been a shock for Peridot, realising that she and Lapis could be-)

I love you, she thinks, I love you, _I love you, I love youIloveyou-_

No words come out though, and the Diamonds are rising once more, so Lapis turns away from her.

* * *

They regenerate, and barely have any time to talk before they're making a beeline towards the nearest scrapyard, trying to build themselves a ship.

Lapis hasn't felt this out of place in a long time.

It's not just because Peridot is angry that she left and stole their entire house in the process, though that doesn't hurt. No, the worst of it is just how . . . close Peridot and Bismuth are.

Lapis doesn't even know Bismuth, yet here she is with Peridot, relaxed and happy, and friendly. Oh, she's nice to Lapis too, but she and Peridot have something special, the kind of bond that could only happen between an Engineer and a Builder; light, cheerful, full of terms that Lapis can't even begin to understand.

She's sitting down, watching them banter back and forth sulkily, when Peridot runs off to find another wrench, and it's then that Bismuth turns to her. "You alright over there?" She calls, face open and friendly, and Lapis shouldn't hate her but she does.

In response, she hums noncommittally, and watches Peridot's retreating figure. Bismuth follows her line of sight and laughs, deep and understanding. "You don't have to worry, y'know" she says.

"I don't?" Lapis challenges, because that is what she's always done, always pushed.

Bismuth shrugs, looking unbothered by her aggressive tone "well, yeah. She likes me, but she loves you."

Then she turns away and gets back to building, leaving Lapis alone to her thoughts.

* * *

It takes one year, two months and almost seven days for the phrase to be used again.

Their relationship is at best undefined, and at worst a paradox. Some of their friends think that they're dating, while others just think they're 'gals being pals'. Not even Lapis or Peridot are sure what's going on. Sudden awareness, of being on the precipice of something, but unsure what that something is. Things that could be described as dates, or flirting, fell into this undefined grey area with them.

The rule was simple; don't look too hard, or everything will be gay.

Then, slowly, things begin to change. Surprisingly, Lapis is the one to actually kick start it all, instead of the usual proactive Peridot.

They're at the Arcade, absolutely killing it at Meat Beat Mania, when Lapis finally works up the courage to say "I really like you Peridot." Peridot drops her meat, and promptly bursts into tears. Before Lapis can even begin to panic, Peridot is climbing Lapis and throwing her arms around her neck, the sounds of the Game Over screen behind them.

Lapis teases her about this for a bit, at least until Peridot has the idea to give her flowers; roses. She had burst into tears, and Peridot had panicked and dropped the bouquet in the mud.

As an apology, Lapis sent her a bouquet of her own; Blue Orchids, like the ones that had been on their farm.

Peridot leaves her funny little notes; you're doing great! Remember to smile! Kick their butts! They never fail to get Lapis to smile.

And, finally, there is a day when Peridot finally says "I love you Lapis", only for Lapis to start laughing and crying at the same time.

_I love you too, Peri._

Lapis tasts like saltwater and crisp cotton and it is the most amazing thing Peridot has ever experienced.

"I love you" Lapis says, pulling back a bit "I love you ,Peri, I love you so-"

Peridot cuts her off with another kiss.


	6. Married/Kids Au

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lapis is called into the principals office

"Are you sure you're ready?" Peridot fretted, flitting about her daughter.

"Yes, mom" Aventurine said, holding up her schoolbag for all to see.

The little Gem's bag was filled with all the things Peridot thought may be useful for school; pens, paper, copybooks, and an emergency button she could press that would immediately alert her mothers that she was in danger. "I don't know why we have to do this everyday" she said, throwing the bag over her shoulder. "I've been attending for three years now, nothings happened."

Peridot started fiddling with the straps of the bag. "Well, you can never be-"

"To cautious, I know mom" she sighed.

"Aven, be nice" Lapis called from the other side of the house, where she was working on a sculpture. "You know how crazy your mother is."

Peridot smiled over at her "I hate you both" she informed them, and Aven laughed as she headed out the door.

The second the door was shut, Peridot let out a low keening noise that would of have been concerning had she not been making said noise everyday since Aventurine first stepped out of the house. Now, Lapis didn't even look up "c'mon, she has a point. Nothing ever happens anymore."

* * *

"What the actual slag did she do?" Lapis demanded as she marched into the Principals Office. Aventurine's face fell; clearly she had been hoping for the Nice Mom. Well, too bad, because if Peridot ever heard about this, Aven would never be allowed to step _outside_ ever again.

Pearl looked completely unphased by Lapis' dramatic entrance, instead gesturing towards the seat beside Aven. "Miss Lazuli, thank you for coming, please have a seat."

"You can call me Lapis, y'know, we do know each other" Lapis commented drily, before turning to Aventurine. "So, what kind of trouble did she get into?"

Pearl made an arch with her hands, before pointing them at Aventurine "your daughter decided to try and recreate the fight between Steven and White Diamond."

Lapis sucked in a deep breath through her nose, then turned to her daughter. "What did you do?"  
  


"Mam, I swear, I didn't know there was a bird's nest outside!"

"Uh-huh" Lapis said "but what did you _do_?"

Feeling the heat under the glare of her mother and sort-of-Aunt figure, Aventurine quickly started talking. "We were learning about it, and me and a couple of others thought it would be fun to recreate! _I_ was Steven" she added proudly.

"You decided to recreate a battle that _actually happened_ , and while the victims of White Diamonds reign were _in the building_?" Lapis asked, incredulous. "That seems incredibly insensitive."

"Actually" Pearl interjected "they loved it. Especially the part where" she cleared her throat and glanced down at a sheet of paper on her desk "'White Diamond started sobbing about her 'totally tragic backstory' and Steven told her to 'stop being bad' and she did'".

Aven pointed at Pearl, victorious. Lapis wasn't deterred in the slightest. "Okay" she said "but what's this about a bird's nest."

Her daughter deflated, almost falling out of her seat because of how low she sunk in it.

"It was supposed to be the big finale. Amber was supposed to - _lightly!_ \- throw me across the room. And instead-"

"She threw her out a window" Pearl finished.

Lapis put her head in her hands. She could _not_ let Peridot find out about this. "And you disrupted a birds nest?" She asked, voice muffled, and Aven cringed.

"I didn't mean to!" She whined, voice raising in a pitch reminiscent of Lapis' wife, and both Pearl and Lapis twitched at the volume of it.

Pearl reached out under the desk and plopped a mesh of twigs down on it. _Dear stars, she kept it._ "Be that as it may, we have a bigger problem."

"I'll pay for the window" Lapis interrupted, exhausted.

"What?" Pearl looked startled "I mean, yeah, you're obviously paying for that, I thought that was a given, but I was actually referring to this." Then she pulled an egg out of the nest, light blue and speckled.

"Oh no" said Aventurine.

"Oh slag" said Lapis.

"Oh yes" said Pearl. "This is a bird's egg- Magpie if I had to guess. And odds are, since the nest was destroyed" she stared hard at Aven "then the mother is gone now. Somebody has to take care of this egg, or it'll die."

It was embarrassing how long it took Lapis to catch on, but when she did. "Oh, no, absolutely not" she stood up, chair scraping behind her "we are not giving her a pet."

* * *

"Mom look! Mam got me a pet!"

There was silence for a moment, then the sound of crashing and Peridot's "WHAT?!"

Aven cupped the little blue egg in her hands, looking besotted even as her mom came skidding up. "What happened to school?"

"One of her teachers laid an egg" Lapis said solemly, placing a hand on her daughter's shoulder, who nodded along.

Peridot stared at them for a long moment." . . . was it Pearl?" She asked.

"Probably" Aven shrugged, and leaped up the stairs to her room "I'm gonna show him his new home!"

Which was code for; _I'm not allowed leave the house and socialise for a week because I'm grounded._

The second Aventurine was out of sight, Peridot turned on Lapis "You got her a pet?!" She hissed, making sure to keep it down.

"I didn't want to, it kind of just happened!"

Peridot blinked. "W-how- never mind, I don't want to know. But we can't keep it!"

Lapis moved so that she could wrap her arms around her wife, leaning down so she could rest her head on Peridot's. "I kept you" she said, eyeing the green and blue band on her partners finger.

Slowly, Peridot turned her head upwards so that they were nose to nose. "Did you just compare me to a bird?" She asked.

"Uh . . . ."  
  


Peridot turned to Pumpkin Jr "guess who's sleeping on the couch tonight, Pumpkin?" He made a little snuffling noise "that's right" she glared at Lapis. "Not me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now I'm now saying that I love writing my OTP and the fankids, but that's exactly what I'm saying.
> 
> Aven probably cannot fly and probably grows up to raise lots and lots birds. (Her nickname is pronounced like Avian)


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It had to end like this

Of course it would end like this. Earth had, once again, become a battlefield, except now Peridot and Lapis were in it.

Or, Lapis was in it.

"Peridot!" She called, jumping over fallen obstacles and bodies. "Peridot!"

She didn't know how they got separated; she had been so sure that her wife was behind her, until she wasn't. And now Lapis had to scrounge through the war torn areas, looking for her, too scared to take to the sky due to the artillery.

"Lapis!"

She turned, relieved. "Peridot!" She ran towards the sound of the voice, turning a sharp corner, only to run headlong into someone. They fell together in a pile of arms and legs, and Lapis pulled back to see Peridot's familiar face. "There you are! Don't do that again-"

Peridot was trembling, her eyes shiny.

"What's wrong?" Lapis asked, changing tracks so fast you could call her a racehorse.

Carefully, Peridot reached up to brush a lock of her hair out of the way of the Gem, revealing it to be cracked.

Oh no.

Oh _noohnoohnoohno_

"Lapis?" Peridot squeaked, reaching out, and Lapis grabbed her face on both sides, squishing her cheeks slightly.

"We can fix this!" She said, manic "we can- we can-"  
  


Peridot watched her for a few moments, before pulling her into a hug. They were still sprawled together, but the way Peridot was gripping her, it was like she was trying to force Lapis inside of her rib cage, an idea Lapis wasn't averse to.

"It'll be okay" Peridot murmured, curling in slightly.

Lapis pulled back a bit, startled to see her wife crying. Startled to realise she herself was crying. "No it won't."

Peridot opened her mouth, as if to argue, to disagree, then closed it again. That was the moment Lapis knew she was going. "Kiss me?" She asked, breathless and starting to glitch.

Whenever they kissed, it was always soft and sweet, tasting of saltwater and lime and lemonade and ice. This kiss was harsh and desperate, and so very, very afraid. Lapis kept her eyes closed; she didn't want to know how her wife was changing, becoming undone. Bad enough she could _feel_ it.

Eventually, the weight on Lapis' lap vanished, but she kept her eyes closed. She only opens them again when her fellow Gems pass through, looking for survivors, and see a Lapis Gem, crying her eyes out, with what looks like broken pieces of green glass in her hands.

She's the only survivor.


End file.
